Breathe in, breathe out.
Feel the touch of a summer's sun on our skin as we are laughing until we can't breathe.
Carefree, running into your arms as blades of grass sneaked through the cracks of our bare toes.
I remember the very first time I looked at you and knew you were exactly what I wanted to be someday.
Classically beautiful with piercing green eyes and an undeniable sense of fashion.
What you held on the inside was even more beautiful.
Through my eyes, you were a saint.
A healer of all boo-boos.
A fixer of all broken things.
Through my eyes, there wasn't anything you couldn't do.
I was around the age of eight when the "c" word was first introduced into our household.
Cancer.
Every person's greatest fear crept its way into our happy home.
You gave me a book on what to expect, what cancer meant for us...for you.
I was terrified, but through my eyes you were strong.
Stronger than the pink Power Ranger.
Stronger than any superhero out there.
You were my mom and my eight year old mind knew cancer didn't hold a candle to the willpower you possessed inside that tiny, five foot, 6 inch frame.
It wasn't easy, but you did it.
Kicked cancer to the curb.
The "c" word wouldn't have to be mentioned in our house ever again.
You did it all.
You made it to every single dance recital.
Every school play and PTA meeting.
You cooked a hot meal most every night and had four girls dressed and ready for school the next morning.
You never stopped being the "superhero" I knew you were.
You helped people you didn't even know.
I remember some nights having strangers spend the night at our house because they crossed your path and you knew they had no where else to go.
I noticed the countless times as I'd be hanging from our overflowing grocery cart in the checkout line, that you would pay for the person's groceries in front of us along with our own.
You carried people, you carried me.
We depended on you like a flower in the sun.
Through my eyes, you never missed a beat.
We grew up, and you grew with us.
Barefoot, dancing on cold kitchen tile, hand in hand as we swayed to the rhythm of your voice.
Little napkin notes still made their way into our lunch boxes.
You were still there, in the front row, cheering us on through every sporting event, first dance, and broken heart.
You prepared us for the trials we would encounter along the way and wiped away the tears when we felt the blow.
Friends came and went, but there you were.
Still beautiful despite the years and growing stronger by the day.
Cancer.
It has a real ugly way of destroying the people who matter the most.
The "c" word found its way back to you, hyped up and ready for a re-match.
Usually prepared for everything, no one, not even you, were prepared for this.
This time you were fragile.
This time you lost your hair.
This time there we didn't know how to save the person who always saved us.
You were exhausted, but not defeated.
You remained strong and I watched in admiration as you fought back with a pair of new heels on your feet and a smile across your face.
Still bold.
Still fearless.
Still my hero.
You became a grandmother.
She fell in love with you at first sight.
Motherly instincts in full bloom, you loved that baby as much as your own.
You rocked, you sang.
You read books from memory and accompanied her in daily naps.
She looked at you from under sleepy, long eyelashes in a way that was all too familiar.
She was hooked and her life was forever changed by your presence.
You fought with a fight driven deep within your tiny frame.
This fight challenged you, weakened you.
You were chemoed, radiated, poked, and prodded but you did not break.
You wanted junk food and fresh flowers.
You were tough as nails and stubborn as could be.
Others before yourself, in sickness and in health.
I can't be certain how you entered this world, but I know you left it as a hero.
I curl up and go back to tiny feet pressed to wet blades of grass.
Juicy Couture on your skin, lighting up the world with your bright green eyes.
Somewhere over the rainbow.
I feel sure that's where you are.
Through my eyes, you are everywhere.
You are the warm light that peaks through my window every morning.
You are the delicate, bright pink petal of a Knockout Rose in full bloom.
Through my eyes, you are a butterfly.
Your intricately detailed wings flap in slow motion, in an array of colors displayed in the sky.
You are my tears, you are my laughs.
You are my strength on my weakest days.
You are the whispers off of my lips as I close my eyes and pray.
Still my best friend, still my mother.
The little pushes to be better, life's unnoticed treasures, a brilliant sunset at the end of a long day.
This is how I see you now, through my eyes.
